America is facing a epoch of unparalleled optimism and tranquility, which is why Sen. Orrin Hatch (R-UT) — who I always think is dead for some reason — took time out of his busy song-writing schedule to draft a letter to Barack Obama telling him that Varsity Blues is the best movie ever, basically. The Hill reports:
“Sen. Orrin Hatch (R-Utah) on Thursday asked President Barack Obama to invite the undefeated Boise State University football team to the White House, even though they did not win the national title.
Hatch — an outspoken critic of college football’s Bowl Championship Series (BCS) — asked that the Broncos appear alongside the undefeated University of Alabama Crimson Tide, the winners of the BCS national title game on Jan. 7.”
Shrewd realpolitik! I haven’t seen the full letter, but Hatch probably included some off-key joke about “the Crimson Tide coming to town some time next month, so maybe my boys should come on a different weekend” and then had a good laugh with the boys, who will be boys.
Barack Obama — who has literally nothing to do except play Wii Resort — was like, “I hate the BCS too, but seriously Orrin, go back into the studio and leave me alone for a few minutes. Read a newspaper, buddy, and get off my dick.” From The Hill:
“The president has previously articulated his displeasure with the BCS system, but he’s focused on more important things right now,” White House spokesman Adam Abrams said in an e-mail.
Obama has criticized the BCS and backed a playoff system in past media appearances but today’s indication shows that he is not quite willing to make a large-scale statement on the issue.
Hahahaha, we basically don’t have a country anymore — or at least we won’t in 15 or so years — much less a college football postseason that makes sense. Enjoy the ride Orrin! Besides, once the floods and droughts come, we’ll all be playing “If The Fire Goes Out, We Die,” so you have that to look forward to.
Also, to be fair to Obama, he hasn’t had time to meet with BCS lobbyists to tell him what his position on the issue is.