Wait, don't immigrants already have microchips implanted in them?

Good lord!  More “microchips in the news” news?!  Is this latest story as crazy as the one about the lady who thought she had a microchip up her bum but it was probably just a turtlehead?

More crazy?  And about immigrants?

OOF.

Friend of the blog Ross Hyzer sent a tip along this afternoon in an e-mail whose subject line read “fucking urbandale”.  “Hmmmm, that sounds like a place in Iowa,” I thought after dozing off briefly.  It would make sense, as Mr. Hyzer and I are both favorite sons of that fair state.

After clicking on the Internet Hyperlink, I was treated to this headline.

Install microchips in illegal immigrants, GOP candidate says

Yes, it seems that Pat Bertroche, a pre-human running for Congress in Iowa, would like to catch those squirrely Browns and tag ’em, just like they do with them squirrely dogs or something.  The Cedar Rapids Gazette reports Bertroche as saying:

I think we should catch ’em, we should document ’em, make sure we know where they are and where they are going,” said Pat Bertroche, an Urbandale physician. “I actually support microchipping them. I can micro-chip my dog so I can find it. Why can’t I microchip an illegal?

“That’s not a popular thing to say, but it’s a lot cheaper than building a fence they can tunnel under,” Bertroche said. [emphasis added.]

No, Bertroche (which sounds European?!), that’s not a popular thing to say.  Just like, oh, I don’t know, making comparisons between Jews and rats is frowned upon.  I KNOW!  Who called the PC police, am I right?!

But hey, you know what, this xenophobe has a point.  He just wants a man to earn what’s rightly his, without getting no handouts from nobody.  Them dang illegals want something for nothing, and no Iowan in his right mind would stand for that.

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4 Responses to Wait, don't immigrants already have microchips implanted in them?

  1. gracenearing says:

    Them dang illegals want something for nothing, and no Iowan in his right mind would stand for that.

    Nice touch, that link to Iowa farm subsidies.

  2. Ed Murray says:

    I’d like to see this guy put together a cost-benefit analysis proving that this would be “cheaper than building a fence they could tunnel under.”

    If he were capable of putting together a rational presentation to support his ignorance, then I wouldn’t feel so bad about putting him in a tanning booth for 24 hours and shipping him to Arizona.

  3. rosshyzer says:

    i shudder for bertroche’s hypothetical offspring, growing up under his radical dog-stuff-good-enough-for-people ethos. will his children be spayed and dewormed when they’re six months old? does everyone at the bertroche residence poop in the yard? the article notes that he’s a “physician” – is he actually a veterinarian, but his worldview doesn’t allow for a distinction between dog and human doctors? so many more questions than answers.

    whatever – whoever wins this primary will most likely get their ass handed to them in november. good luck against leonard boswell, losers!

  4. Pingback: Is Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell soft on Nazis? - John Knefel - Making a Mockery - True/Slant

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