Brave Philly cop tasers trapped, unarmed fan at baseball game (w/ video)

I’m kind of hacking Allison Kilkenny’s taser beat by writing about this, but there’s enough police misconduct to go around.  At last night’s Philadelphia Phillies game a 17-year-old kid ran onto the field and was treated to 50,000 volts of New Justice, care of a taser and the small-dicked cop who wielded it.

The Philadelphia Taser Brigade (police dept.) responded to allegations that the cop acted inappropriately when he tasered an unarmed man who wasn’t a threat by offering to tase anybody who has a problem with their procedure.

Lt. Frank Vanore, a police spokesman, says Commissioner Charles Ramsey reviewed the tape and felt the officer had acted within the department’s guidelines, which allow officers to use Tasers to arrest fleeing suspects. [emphasis added.]

Yeah, fleeing suspects.  You know, like all those guys who run onto a baseball field and then slip away through a back alley.  Frankly, if the cops thought that this kid seriously had a chance to escape, maybe they should have more confidence in themselves.

“Hey guys, we’ve got this kid penned in on all sides!  But, you know, we’re not very good at being cops so he’ll probably get away!”

But no, no, he didn’t get away.  He got taught what was good for him, much to the delight of the nearby, overpaid, drugged-up mutants.

Several Phillies placed gloves over their faces and appeared to be stifling laughter at the wild scene.

Hahahahaha, casual use of potentially deadly force (see those links to Kilkenny above) is a real laugh riot.  Also, it was the right thing to do, according to some kind of athletic fan fiction website called Back Porch Fanhouse.

A couple things to note before we get on with the soapboxing: 1) he’s a minor, 2) apparently, players were covering their faces with their gloves to stifle laughter, 3) theoretically, he wasn’t posing a threat, 4) there was a bomb threat Saturday in New York City.

The last one might not seem relevant, but I tend to think it is. Yes, for most of us viewing at home — and, it appears from various YouTube videos, fans in the stadium — this young man wasn’t a threat. But to an officer charged with keeping players and fans safe, it’s probably not worth waiting around to see how this thing plays out. [emphasis added.]

What a fantastic point.  By that logic, cops should be tasering people who are parked in a no-standing zone outside the stadium.  I mean, it’s against the law, so let’s bang bang bang and settle it later.  Far better for us as a country to be gripped by the delusional fear that every shadow in the night is Satan come to kill us than to treat attention-hungry jackasses like the silly pranksters they so obviously are.

It’s also worth noting that despite CNN’s claim that this is the first time a taser has been used on a fan at a game, that’s not the case.  An Oakland A’s fan was tasered several times last year in the stands, again, for being a drunken ass at a baseball game, which is un-American [via].  But let’s not think about that.  Let’s instead laugh about that “Don’t tase me, bro” guy and not concern ourselves with the dangers of the hilariously named “less-lethal weapons.”

Here’s the video of history’s greatest monster getting what he had coming to him.

[youtubevid id=”riCu3LJOgmk”]

This entry was posted in Crime, Sports and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Brave Philly cop tasers trapped, unarmed fan at baseball game (w/ video)

  1. James Broun says:

    So, everybody should be allowed to be disruptive at any place or time without consequence?? How many people should be allowed to run around the field during a game? For how long?

    I think it is a great lesson. Not only will this kid never do anything retarded like this again; but many retarded kids who might have done this themselves will now think twice before doing so. Nobody was hurt, and it almost makes as good a video as the “don’t taze me bro” clip.

  2. jc1metwo says:

    Well, he wanted to draw attention to himself – he got it – 30,000 volts of it. All kinds of things like billy clubs, rubber bullets, water cannons, cars, are potentially lethal. There’s always risk. The officer did what was necessary to subdue him and sent a message to other would-be criminals. Yes, he engaged in several criminal acts. Deterrence at work.

  3. gracenearing says:

    Interesting. I’ve watched baseballs games that have been interrupted by freaked out cats and squirrels, a puzzled raccoon, a plague of moths, aggressive seagulls, and completely indifferent pigeons. None of them ever got tasered, which of course would be considered cruelty to animals (except probably the moths).

    The typical American is not physically fit enough to run around a baseball field nonstop for very long. The cop should have waited about 90 more seconds until the guy’s asthma kicked in; then he wouldn’t have had to use the taser.

  4. ragnar says:

    You nearly had a good article but you ruined it in the first two paragraphs when you stooped to name-calling, hyperbole and general assholishness.

    Rational people present rational arguments.

    Don’t you guys have editors?

  5. voynitzev says:

    It is funny, I feel the need to prove that I am not a right-wing whack job in order to post this comment – suffice to say, I am not. I am a former Brooklynite, actor, Obama supporter (and donor), waiter, etc. And I could not disagree with this commentary more. I remember watching a Royals/White Sox game where two fans ran out on the field and beat a first-base coach about the head. We have seen tennis stars be stabbed by fans, etc. No one knows if this kid was armed or not – and using a taser on him did the job. Non-lethal, no side effects – but someone who is actively breaking the law is stopped. Non-lethally. The point of a taser. I recently saw a video of a belligerent fan tasered – I think the security in that case acted COMPLETELY inappropriately. But in this case – stay off the field. Nothing would have happened to you, or disrupted the thousands of fans who pid to see professional athletes, not a knucklehead with ADD.

    • John Knefel says:


      Thanks for the comment, and suffice to say that if you keep reading and commenting, no need for the caveat at the beginning. You don’t strike me as a right-winger.

      The problem is twofold. 1) Tasers are not “non-lethal.” They are less-lethal. People die every year from tasers — in many cases the tasing was unnecessary. I’m not saying that tasers should never be used. I think have the possibility to be a helpful, less-lethal tool for cops. But they shouldn’t be overused and treated as a safe way to subdue someone. Which leads to the next point.

      2) The more times cops use tasers and are cheered on, the more often they’ll use tasers in general, and in situations where they aren’t needed. Normalizing the use of potentially deadly force to subdue a non-violent jackass is a bad thing. Society should put emphasis on police restraint.

  6. Mr. Knefel & Co.

    This is really not very complicated, police officers are authorized to use as much force as required “to compel compliance by an unwilling subject”. All force is potentially lethal and there is a continuum of of force available to police officers pending on the circumstances. How far along the continuum an officer may go depends on the danger that the unwilling subject poses to him or herself or to others.

    The use of pepper spray or a taser is a Level 4 use of force and is for “When the suspect is violent or threatening, more extreme, but non-deadly measures must be used to bring the suspect under control, or affect an arrest. Before moving to this level of force, it is assumed that less physical measures have been tried and deemed inappropriate.”

    Using this standard, the use of a taser is inappropriate. The unwilling subject was posing no threat to anyone (other than common sense) and no lower levels of force had been attempted. Level 3 would have included “Empty Hand” Techniques, such as catching the subject and throwing him to the ground followed by wrist or elbow lock. Since the subject had not responded to either the simple presence of the police officer nor to verbal commands and was not violent or threatening, Level 3 would have been appropriate.

    The level of force used by a police officer is not legally dependent on how stupid the unwilling subject is, but on how dangerous he is.

  7. Pingback: The illustrated brutality of cops and tasers - John Knefel - Making a Mockery - True/Slant

  8. Pingback: Hero cop offers to beat Mexican guy until he’s no longer Mexican (video) - John Knefel - Making a Mockery - True/Slant

  9. James Broun says:

    A taser may cause physical pain for a brief moment, but it does not cause bruising or broken bones, nor does it seriously endanger the vast majority of people exposed to it. Most of the people who might die from a taser shock would not be able to run like a moron around a baseball field. You will notice how the kid flopped down gracefully, and then got back up without too much of a fuss. He wasn’t crying or screaming.

    You can snivel about police brutality, and complain that the kid wasn’t doing anything that warranted getting zapped; but we live in a society full of people who do stupid things. We have to take our shoes off to prove we aren’t going to set off a shoe bomb on an airplane. We have to have our backpacks searched before we go into public arenas. Our kids have to pass through a metal detector before they can get into school.

    You can’t tell me for a second that we should just let any idiot do any disruptive thing they want to as long as they aren’t hurting anyone else physically. If I am paying to watch a sporting event, and Bilbo the Dumbass wants to ruin my fun, I might cause him more pain than a taser. It is his fun versus mine.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s